The Adventure Starts Here: One Year and Beyond: Bedtime Battles

Thursday, June 26, 2014

One Year and Beyond: Bedtime Battles



I will start by saying that if you are looking for advice on how to get your child to sleep more or better, you won't find it here.   We do have a bedtime routine that includes bath with daddy, lotion & PJs, reading books, and then me rocking him to sleep.  We never sleep trained or let Noah cry it out.  We live in an apartment where our neighbor has banged on our wall and complained about crying (Noah crying for less than 5 minutes in the middle of the night while I go get him a bottle).  I can't imagine the outrage if we actually let him cry it out!  Even without the neighbor though, Chris and I decided that we didn't want to go that route.  I understand it works, but we just can't do it.  As a result, I still get up multiple times a night with my almost 20 month old.



From day one, we held Noah a lot!  Between myself, Chris, and my mom, he was held all the time, even when sleeping.  We basically fought over who could hold him next.  It got to the point that it seemed like Noah would only sleep if he was lying on someone.  Chris and I took shifts at night so we could each get some sleep.  Eventually, I transitioned him first to sleeping in the nap nanny, then to co-sleeping with us in our bed, and finally at 3 months he was in his crib.  From 3-6 months, he was a great sleeper.  I recently looked back at the journal I kept with how much he drank and slept each day, and he was sleeping in his crib and through the night... it was amazing!  Then he got his first tooth and it's never been the same. 


At first, when Noah started waking up in the middle of the night again, I didn't handle the lack of sleep well.  Thankfully my mom was able to come help and let me take a nap when it got really bad.  But as time went on I really got used to it (and this is coming from someone who was usually asleep by 10pm and needed at least 8 hours to function).  It's been a long time since I've slept through the night, and I'm now used to sleeping in 3-4 hour increments (on a good night).  To ease the situation, we started bringing Noah into bed with us when he woke up after midnight.  Noah has never been the kind of kid who woke up wanting to play.  He just woke up wanting a bottle and to be rocked back to sleep.  We are working on weaning him off the bottle, but after multiple wake-ups, I usually end up giving in just so we can both get some rest.  It's funny though, because I often ask Chris (usually after a super rough night) if he would want to do anything differently with the next child.  He always answers no, he wouldn't be able to handle the crying involved with sleep training.  And so we continue doing what we are doing.  


When Noah turned 1, I asked my doctor her opinion on the whole sleep (or lack of) thing.  She said that if I'm fine getting up with him and letting him co-sleep with us, then there's nothing wrong with it (as long as we do it safely).  She said she used to have her kids co-sleep with her as well.  But she said that if it ever got to the point where you resented your child because of it, that's when you need to try something else.  I thought that made perfect sense and it was exactly what I needed to hear.  While I would love to get more sleep, I'm still happy with our decision.  I'm not looking for tips or advice, and I know I'm not the one to give advice on sleeping either.  I think that there are many ways to parent and I respect every parents' decision when it's made out of love and is in the best interest of the family.  I try my best not to judge others and hope that they do the same for me.

4 comments:

  1. Glad to read about someone else who co sleeps and loves it!! Good for you!! Loved your post!

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  2. Great post, Meghan! I think everyone's situation is different and we are all just doing our best at this whole parenting thing. Noah is so loved and you are doing a great job :) I didn't even link up today because sleep is such a difficult topic among mommies!! What a great doctor you have, her point of view is awesome! I agree with you that none of us mamas are in a place to give advice on someone else's situation, especially when it comes to sleep!! We just have to own our decisions and be confident that we did the right thing!

    Loved hearing your point of view :)

    Can't wait to see what you do with Noah's big boy room!!



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  3. How have a never seen Noah's nursery? I LOVE IT! Can't wait to see how you decorate his big boy room in your new house!

    Loving that sweet little hat on him too!

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  4. We lived with our daughter in an apartment for the first 8 months of her life. We never had anyone complain but I was so paranoid about it. It wasn't until we moved into a house, that I let her cry it out in the middle of night. And sure enough, she quickly learned to sleep through the night. With that being said, if I still lived in an apartment, I would still be attending to her cries in the middle of night :)

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